Supporting My Habit

My name is Brian O'Rourke, and I'm a bookaholic.

(Quiet, respectful applause from the other addicts.)

Yes it's taken me too long to come to terms with my addiction to books. But by first acknowledging my problem, I'd like to think I'm taking a step in the right direction. I'm on the road to recovery.

Couple of weeks ago, I went through our "library" for something to read. I couldn't count the number of books on two hands that I bought and have not read yet. And no, that's not just because I have a problem counting (damned base ten system). When I ran out of fingers and toes, I grabbed the abacus and tried to figure out how the hell anyone ever used one of those for simple math. Anyways, there were a lot of books waiting to be read, some of them purchased more than TWO YEARS AGO.

Despite having so many tomes in the bullpen, I feel a compulsion, almost daily, to drive to a bookstore and spend money I don't really have on more books. I've only recently forced myself to start using the library. My "re-read rate" is less than one percent, so you'd think the library would make all the sense in the world, but no, the gluttonous capitalist in me must own everything he's ever read. And I've even figured out a way to rationalize my uncontrollable spending: I tell myself it's my literary duty to purchase books because very soon, I hope that people will buy MY book.

Not sure if you're a bookaholic? Here are some signs:

1) You tell yourself that you can stop buying books any time you want.
2) You tell yourself you can be a few days late paying the mortgage because Ken Follett's latest just came out.
3) You have at least five books waiting to be read, but still, the first idea you come up with for something to do on a weeknight is drive to Barnes & Noble.
4) You have a book in the car with you while you're driving, and you read while stopped at red lights.
5) You have a book in the car with you while you're driving, and you try to think of ways you can read and drive at the same time.
6) When every time someone buys you a book as a birthday gift/holiday present, you say: "Thanks, but I've already read it."

I'm thinking of pitching a new celebreality TV show about us bookaholics. I've heard that Gary Busey likes to read. Matter of fact, it doesn't matter what the theme of the show is as long as Gary Busey's in it. Put that man in front of a camera and you've got gold.

My latest literary addiction is a Northern Irish author by the name of Adrian McKinty. I won't go into great detail here about his work, because I'll probably end up writing a short review on one of his books in the near future. The guy's damned good.